Working on your own mind and body, burning fat, gaining muscle, losing weight, building confidence or strength; all those things take time and consistency. No matter who is training you or what coach you have, it’s your self-coach that makes the biggest impact on your progress.
Life moves forward quickly, sometimes even frighteningly fast. Our internal environment is ultimately what determines which direction we’re heading in, either closer towards our goals or further from them. Each of us has our own internal compass, conscience, voice… When we grow distant from that voice or if we’ve never connected with it in the first place, when we underestimate its importance or neglect its needs, that voice begins to grow outside of our control. It can turn against us, make us doubt ourselves, paralyze us with fear, drain us with depression and sabotage our every effort.
Do you ever feel like your own worst enemy? I did for most of my life, actually most people do, and those who don’t will have at least heard of the idea that we’re the only thing standing in our own way. There’s another popular phrase that fits here, “If ya can’t beat em’, join em’!” If you can become allies with yourself, if you can seek to understand, accept, love and work with that “enemy” in the mirror, you can work together in powerful synchronicity. That inner voice can become a powerful guide, a highly-effective coach, propelling you towards your goals faster and picking you up when you need it most.
Thankfully, the process of becoming a good self-coach is quite simple and you can start small. Simply identify all manner of bad internal habits and seek to reverse them by replacing them with good ones. Things like judging, insulting or doubting yourself are great examples of bad internal habits and they must be reversed! Instead of insulting yourself, build yourself up! Instead of dwelling on past failures or shame, dwell on accomplishments and what you’re proud of! Be grateful for all the things you have instead of focusing on what you wish you had! These are all ancient instructions for being at peace with yourself.
I hear plenty of people say “I hate my life”. That’s a really powerful statement and it can be very damaging over time. We have even popularized the abbreviation FML because so many people felt that way. Reversing that statement and instilling inside yourself the belief that you are happy to be alive is a very simple, yet easily overlooked concept. Every single morning I repeat the phrase “I’m so happy to be awake and alive!” several times. It’s not forced, I actually FEEL it most of the time and it’s a great feeling! – but I can easily remember the days where those words sounded hollow and flat, when I didn’t believe them at all because my internal environment was so toxic, when spoke them only out of the slightest hope that I would eventually mean them.
It can take time to tame the beast inside; if you’ve been angry at yourself for years, it can take some time to calm that fire. If you’ve been scared and anxious for your entire lifetime than it will take more than a simple week of transformative thinking to break that cycle, but it ABSOLUTELY can be done. If you’ve been depressed for a long time it can be awhile until your smile feels authentic again, but anyone can rise above their own emotions with a fair amount of consistency and the tiniest sliver of hope!
Be good to yourself by being a good coach to yourself! This video has some great tips on how to escape the treadmill of pattern and habit, get out of your own way and fight on your own side!